I was born Francis Albert DesMarais in Worcester, MA, USA on August 15, 1941 into a French-Canadian/American family. My father was the son of Franco/American parents who had settled in New Hampshire, and my mother was the last of 11 children born to French-Acadian immigrants living in Massachusetts. As with almost all children of French Canadian parentage, I was baptized and raised in the Roman Catholic Church. This left an indelible mark on my whole life’s experience. My early years were very much influenced by the thinking and practices of the Roman Catholic witness, especially as expressed in the Franco-Canadian/American community. Most of my primary school education was obtained under the tutelage of French Canadian Orders of teaching Nuns who had ministered to the numerous French-Canadian communities scattered throughout New England and Upstate NY.

It was not too far along life’s path that I noticed, accepted and developed the penchant for being very inquisitive and desirous of sound answers to almost incessant questioning, especially with regard to matters of Faith and the practice thereof. This ultimately led me to taking the decision to break my affiliation with the Roman Catholic community in 1958 (just as the age of Vatican II was dawning) and accepting membership in the Episcopal Church. This was mostly due to the witness of a parish in Albany, NY, of the Anglo-Catholic tradition in Anglicanism, which at that time was a foremost example of Catholic spirituality, teaching and practice, especially in its liturgical life. Names and teachings of the great divines such as William Laud, John Mason Neale, Edmund Pusey, John Keble, John Henry Newman, C.S. Lewis, Evelyn Underhill, and yes even Thomas Aquinas, Francis de Sales, Philip Neri, and G. K. Chesterton, were ever present in the daily flow of thought, homilies and liturgical prayer of this little parish of Grace & Holy Innocents, shepherded by one of the greatest luminaries of Anglo-Catholicism in the USA, Fr. Loren Nichols Gavitt.

However, it wasn’t long before this Golden age of Anglo-Catholic influence in the Episcopal Church would see its waning, and the 1970’s brought the increasingly modernist and ”anything goes” approach to teaching and discipline in the Episcopal Church, and eventually the whole Anglican Communion. I began to experience this while I was in my University years, especially during the years I spent in California, 1964-69. The tumult that this “revolution” began to create had an effect on my spiritual journey, one that would cause many years of restless searching, and personal upheaval. I responded by re-affirming my communion with the Roman Catholic Church, especially since I had become increasingly involved in the Liturgical life as a Church Musician and Liturgy Co-coordinator.  From 1971 until 1994 I served in a professional capacity at several Roman Catholic Parishes in the Diocese of Albany. In many ways it was a “hands on” learning experience, however, much of what I had learned and experienced during my years as an Episcopalian layman and musician came to be most valuable. Even the year that I spent with an Episcopalian Religious Order would have a lasting affect on the work I had undertaken.  In some ways it was like starting from scratch, after the almost total abandonment by the Roman Church of its rich heritage with the forced adoption of the Novus Ordo and the use of the vernacular. More on this can be discussed in future threads. Suffice it to say, Roman Catholic parishes needed musicians, especially those with a knowledge of and sensitivity for the rich heritage of the Western Church, Roman & Reformed. I had found and accepted a “crusade.”

During this period I became increasingly interested in “Orthodoxy,” this exotic, reclusive, ethno-centric form of Christianity which began to arise out of its ghetto-slumber in the USA. I was gradually finding out that there was more to it than folk-festivals, parish dinners and dances, interesting but unfamiliar music repertoire, and beautifully adorned, smoke filled sanctuaries. My visits to Orthodox Churches in the 1960’s were brief and seminal, leaving me curious but feeling totally alien. It was to be in the mid-1970’s, much through the acquaintance of a Roman Catholic Priest whose family was Russian Orthodox, that I began to “water the plant” that would one day blossom, perhaps the tree that would sprout, alike to the oak of Mamre, or the cedar of Lebanon. For sure, the music of the local Russian parish, and the splendor of the newly built Greek parish, were both invitations to explore more carefully this strangely enticing Eastern European/Mediterranean import and expression of Christianity – which I always understood to be “schismatic” and suspect.  However, it was my decision in the early 1980’s to study more extensively the ecclesial history, theological positions, and the legacy of Eastern Spirituality which so profoundly manifests the authentic witness of the “Orthodox Way.”  I was influenced greatly by the writings of  theologians and teachers such as Alexander Schmemmann, Vladimir Losky, Timothy Ware, John Meyendorf, George Florovsky, Sergei Bulgakov, Dumitru Staniloae, and yes, even greats with names like Robert Taft and George Maloney (both Jesuits), Beauduin & Botte (Benedictines),  and also acquaintances, especially in Europe, such as  Andre Gouzes, a French Dominican, as well as members of the Benedictines of Chevetogne (Belgium) and the Fraternity of Jerusalem in France.  This was all put together in the early 1990’s with the assistance of a holy and scholarly Orthodox priest who was serving a small Orthodox parish in my region at the time. In 1992, on Lazarus Saturday, I was Chrismated as an Orthodox Christian.

During my first months as an Orthodox Christian I continued to immerse myself in my new-found treasure – Orthodoxy. First it was Great & Holy Week and then the exuberant joy of Pascha and the weeks which followed. One unexpected development during the winter of 1992 proved to be an influence for years to come.   In my journey to Orthodoxy I was becoming aware that there were many Western Christians who had made the same step, and that some continued to worship in various liturgical forms which were approved by Orthodox Bishops, and that there were several Western Rite movements in the USA and Europe. I was also aware that there were several Christians in my region who were interested in this movement. I began to explore this phenomenon, and eventually met with  clergy and laypersons from Western Churches who shared this vision. This eventually led me to visit the Cathedral of St. Irenee in Paris of the Orthodox Church of France (ECOF). It was a visit which changed my whole direction. During the fall and winter of 1993/94 I made the decision to pursue the possibility of joining with others in the formation of a Western Orthodox parish in our region. Through the guidance of other Western Orthodox priests and laity, as well as some Eastern Orthodox clergy, contacts were made with Monseigneur Germain of the French Church. In the spring of 1994 I was asked to accept Deacon’s Orders with the commission to assist in the formation of this community. I was ordained Priest in October of 1994 and the beginning of a Western Orthodox Mission was launched, and placed under the protection of St. Gregory of Rome.  I served ECOF, both in the USA and in France from 1994 to 2005.

The details of these years are suitable for another posting. Suffice it to say they were years of great joy and personal growth. My interest in Liturgical studies continued and became more intense. I served the Church by undertaking, with the assistance of a member of our Mission, Dr. William Carragan, a liturgiologist, linguist and plainsong scholar, the task of translating the liturgical material of ECOF. Together we produced a scholarly and contemporary translation and music adaptation of the Liturgy of St. Germanus of Paris and the accompanying Offices and Rites used by the French Orthodox Church, all done under the blessing of Mgr. Germain and the Liturgical Commission in Paris. And this was not just an academic venture. The Liturgy was celebrated almost weekly, as well as on the Major Feasts of the year and of the Sanctoral calendar. Marriages, Baptisms, Chrismations, and Funerals were also celebrated during the first six years of our Mission life. In 2000 I was asked to accept additional responsibilities in the life of the Church in France. With the consent of the small but dedicated flock of St. Gregory Mission, I accepted the calling to become active in the administration of the Church as well as Rector of the Parish of La Trinite – St. Clair in Nantes. I held this position until October of 2005.  Members of the Albany Mission were absorbed into Eastern Orthodox parishes. Some unfortunately could not make the transition and are now worshipping in non-Orthodox Western Churches.

The non-Canonical difficulties which plagued the French Church since 1993, when the Romanian Orthodox Church withdrew its canonical protection, as well as internal church problems and the personal behavior of Bishop Germain, all proved to be a major barrier for the continued growth and acceptance of ECOF by the family of Orthodox Churches. Regardless of its adherence to the basic tenets of Orthodoxy, the authenticity of its mission and the integrity of its Rites, ECOF fell further and further away from the possibility of reconciliation with the Eastern Orthodox Churches. The intransigence of the Eastern Patriarchates and their reluctance to assist this visionary community of Western Orthodox Christians after the rupture with the Romanian Church will add another chapter to the struggle of the Western Orthodox movement. For me, I could no longer accept this marginalization, both caused by the actions of ECOF and imposed by the Eastern Churches, and in October of 2005 I petitioned and was accepted into the Western European Exarchate (Russian Tradition) of the Ecumenical Patriarchate. I currently serve at the disposition of Archbishop Gabriel of Comana as a Mission Priest. With his blessing I am also serving as a professor of English Studies under the aegis of the Metropolitinate of Moldavia/Bucovina at the invitation of Metropolitan Teofan of that See.